Buford's World
The strait poop on Web-TP

Installin yer Web-TP unit's as easy as 1-2-3...

1. Rip out that ole-fashion Toilet Paper holder an throw it in the trash.
2. Install yer new WEB-TP Bathroom Console right sqware in front of yer easy chair, throne, john, stool or whutever yew call it.
3. Plug it inta yer power line an yer phone line an yer off an runnin!

Now when yew set yerself down inta yer easy chair, yew've got everthing yew need fer a relaxin, rewardin, fulfillin an educational experyence: An infree-red sensor kin tell when yew move into place, and autymaticly turns on yer WEB-TP Bathroom Console. Of course, yer Buford Browser takes ya strait inta the Buford's World Home Page.

Yew kin fergit Netskape Comunycater and Inernet Eksplorer, cawse yer TP Rock n Roller Controller is yer new Navigater. Grab it an rock it back an forth ta move yer curser from side ta side. Roll it up an down ta scroll yer curser.

NOTE: be keerful when yer pullin a wad a paper off the roll fer other purposes cuz yewll be at the bottom a yer Web page afore yew know it! WEB-TP... the start of a new revolushun! No more unsitely newspapers an magazines all over yer bathroom floor.... When yew do yer bizness, yew dont need nothin but WEB-TP. We're thinkin a usin Elvis fer the WEB-TP advertisin campains: "If I wuz still with yew today, Id bestow my crown on WEB-TP, the NEW King of Rock n Roll!" The kids'll fergit abowt MTV... now it'll be "I want my WEB-TP!" Well how much would yew pay fer it? We're targetin $295... about the price of a good toilet!

Web-TP F.A.Q.
(Frequintly Askt Quorstions)